


Dancing through our house (with the ghost of you)

by kissyledss



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Coda, Hope is a dangerous thing, Hurt Eddie Diaz, Hurt Evan "Buck" Buckley, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post 3x15 (9-1-1 TV), Sad Evan "Buck" Buckley, Worried Eddie Diaz
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:33:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23776909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kissyledss/pseuds/kissyledss
Summary: The room is the first thing that Buck hates. The second one is the men in front of him. The third is the reason why he's in this room.(kind of Coda to 3x15.)
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 38





	Dancing through our house (with the ghost of you)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Please forgive any mistake as English is not my first language. xo

The room is the first thing that Buck hates. The second one is the men in front of him. The third is the reason _why_ he's in this room. 

"Evan, it's ok to feel the way you're feeling right now and I hope..." the man says and Buck wants to punch him in the face and yell at him _what do you know about how I'm feeling_ but instead he remains in his seat, frozen as he has been since that day in the middle of the rain. _Hopeless._

_"Hope?",_ Buck says with a smile, the same one that he has been using when people start to ask him how is he doing after everything that has happened. "Hope is a dangerous thing for a man like _me,_ " he says and the man in front of him makes the face that Buck hates so much. _Pity. Compassion. Whatever._ Buck is tired of this, of being here in this chair with this man in this room and above all, he's so _done_ with this feeling which is killing him _every time_ he breathes, _every time_ he wakes up. That feeling in his chest treating to left him without air in the middle of the night, the numbness when he saves a life and the incapacity to evolve to another version of himself that doesn't feel like _this._

"A man like you?", Aníbal asks, "What does that mean, Evan?", he asks again, a frown settles on his face and Buck hates it because it's a reminder of him being so complicated, so confusing, so _exhausting._

"You know what I mean," Buck says without patience. He just wanna go home and sleep and never wake up again, succumb to the numbness of his heart. That's all he wants. "Our time is over, can I go now?" he asks quickly because he's starting to run out of air again and his vision is becoming blurry. He needs to go _home._

_"Cariño..."_ he listens to _that_ voice which has been haunting him since a few months ago and a feeling of peace surrounds him immediately. _"Are you gonna tell him about me?"_ Eddie's voice is filling his soul with every minute that pass and Buck feel himself hope a little bit for his future with the man he loves. However, he doesn't feel ready to tell Aníbal about Eddie, not yet and maybe not _ever._

Aníbal is watching him carefully by the time Buck looks up from his lap. "You can go now but you have to _remember_ , Evan that..." Buck stops listen to the man when Eddie stars to talk to him again.

_Tell him about me, please. Please, Buck..._

But Buck can't. Not yet. Not ever. 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments keep me going!
> 
> Thank you for reading! follow me on tw @kissyfearless.


End file.
